Actor, Writer, Jedi, Singer,

Actor, Writer, Jedi, Singer,
You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you

Monday, July 10, 2017

Autism 30 Day Challenge

Day 1.      Make yourself known.  Tell the world your name and age.  Talk about your diagnosis.  Are you self or professionally diagnosed?  Do you think self-diagnosis is valid?  When did you realize/find out you were autistic?  Post a photo of yourself if you’d like.

If you are reading this, you know my name. I am 21 years old and I self-diagnosed myself with autism (after having had a family member- who has a child with autism- tell my mom to look into it for me and after having read a lot about it) when I was around 17. I obviously think self-diagnosis is valid (I have dealt with enough incompetent psychologist people).

Day 2.      Talk about passing and/or being out.  Are you out as autistic?  How have people reacted?  Do they treat you differently after they found out?  Do you attempt to pass?  If you do try to pass have you experienced autistic burnout from trying to pass?: 

Not really sure I like the ' being out' description here, since it seems like it is being high-jacked from the LGBTQA+ group (and, while I'm asexual, I'm not a part of that group, so I feel I shouldn't). But, am I open about being autistic? Yes, very much so. I also pass....kinda. Like, most people wouldn't be "SHE'S AUTISTIC!" but I know people get this 'off' sense about me, even if they refuse to say it. I do attempt to pass but I usually fail and then feel sad :( 

Day 3.      Talk about relationships, both platonic and romantic.  Do you have anyone special in your life?  Have your relationships been affected by your being autistic?  Have you found it hard to make and maintain friendships?  Do you have a lot of friends or very few?  

I have never dated or been in a romantic relationship, sadly, and I believe a part of that is the fact that I am autistic. I'm not the type of girl people usually go after and men generally show no interest in me. I have had friends and I have found that it can affect friendships and it often makes it hard for me to MAKE friends in the first place. I have always had few friends. Weirdly enough, I had good luck when I was in the Shakespeare group while studying abroad :) 

Day 4.      Talk about your family and support.  Who in your life has helped you?  Have medical and mental health providers served your needs?  Do you feel like your family is supportive of you being autistic?:

I have good family support from my immediate family. Even when we didn't know I was autistic, they did a pretty decent job dealing with my issues. They aren't perfect- no one is- of course, but they did better than many parents and I am very lucky. I went to a psychologist when I was younger for a time but she didn't help much sadly. I do feel like most of my family is supportive. 

Day 5.      Talk about employment and your career.  What do you do to support yourself?  Are you on disability?  Was it hard to get?: 

I am still a student, so I haven't gotten anywhere with my main career paths yet (but I am hoping to get published soon). I DO have a current part time job which I use to pay for things like Taekwondo, books for school, and gas (and for my travel while I was in England). No, not on disability. 

Day 6.      Talk about music, art, writing, and other forms of creativity.  Are you a creative person?  What do you create?  Do you include autistic themes in your creations?  Does your creativity help you to deal with your autism?: 

I AM a creative person :) :) I LOVE to act and write and I also sing and do Taekwondo. I used to play piano and clarinet and do dance as well. 
As for creating, I create characterizations out of the characters I act out AND I create stories and characters in the books I write. As for autistic themes, I do have characters that are autistic in some of my stories (including my current one) but I don't want to focus on 'issues' but instead let them be explored organically in the story, since that's how life is. I feel like my creativity does help, yes. 

Day 7.      Talk about community.  How are you treated by your local community?  Do you participate in any online communities?  How have they reacted to you being autistic?: 

I don't fit in with the autistic community some of the time. A majority of people have ideas I don't agree with. But, when I have talked to some people online, they were nice. I do all right online and that's where I've made a lot of my current best friends. But I have never been popular online. 

Day 8.      Talk about traditional media.  Have you been influenced by autism themes in the media? Have you had to correct misinformation about autistic people that others got from the media?: 

I haven't, tbh. I have always just kinda been myself and done what I thought was right for me. I have had to correct misinformation but people don't listen often. Instead of doing that, I tend to just share things online. 

Days 9 and 10 are a little different in that they have two prompts.  I know the issues that many autistic people have with autism speaks and with cure culture so for these days there is an alternative prompt should you feel uncomfortable talking about those topics.  You can answer either/both/any combination of the prompts that you wish and I’ve attempted to have the secondary prompts be more fun/lighthearted.
Day 9.      Talk about Autism Speaks.  Do you support them?  What’s your opinion about their policies? And/or  Talk about special interests.  Do you have a special interest?  What is it?  Feel free to infodump.
Day 10.  Talk about a cure.  What is your opinion about seeking a cure for autism?  Do you want a cure?  Why or why not?  And/Or  Talk about stimming.  Do you stim? How?  What are your favorite stims?  Do you have different stims for when you are happy or agitated?: 

About autistm speaks...well, from what I've heard they aren't nice at all. I don't know much, but I don't like the demonizing they do of autistic kids and I feel like they should give more of their money to HELP the families of autistic kids instead of just searching for a cure. In regards to a cure? I don't think a cure is possible, perse. It's not a disease so you can't fix it completely. There ARE things to do to prevent it and things you can do to make the negative symptoms more manageable, but I think searching for a cure is a bit silly. Just finds ways to make it better. 
SPECIAL INTERESTS!!?? :D :D OKAY! So, acting, writing, Taekwondo, music, Star Wars (particularly the EU), Supernatural, the Jedi, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Siri Tachi, Dean Winchester, Castiel, SiriWan, Destiel, Jaina Solo, Middle Earth stories, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Whedonverse, any person I have a crush on at a given time, etc.

In regards to stimming, I do. And I do different ones when I am excited/happy and when I am upset/agitated.

Day 11.  Talk about sensory issues.  Do you also have sensory processing disorder?  What kind of clothes do you wear?  What foods do you eat?  Are you sensitive to light or sounds?  How do you deal with overstimulation?: 

I do have sensory issues. The main one is sound but other ones bother me too. I have had trouble recently with food. I tend to wear unisex clothes and modest clothes cause more revealing clothes make me uncomfortable. I like being covered up. For foods, certain dry meats bother me as do certain overpowering tastes. I can be sensitive to lights but it's not that much. Sounds YES. Also, I have trouble with most physical contact. I DO like hugging specific people but me actually LIKING and enjoying a hug are only things I have gotten from 1-3 people in my entire life. I typically dislike or feel indifferent to hugs (sometimes I seek them out from my mom when I am upset but otherwise, no). 

Day 12.  Talk about ableism.  Have you experienced discrimination?  Have you been the target of hate speech or slurs?  Have you been a victim of abuse or violence?  What’s the rudest thing someone has said to you about autism or you being autistic?: 

Not discrimination, no, but I have had people be mean about things or rude. And no one had ever try and be violent towards me cause I will kick their nuts so hard they break. No hate speech either, thankfully. 

Day 13.  Talk about something funny.  Has anything humorous or ironic ever happened to you because you were autistic?: 

Well, there are but I don't want to post about it online since it's personal (nothing bad, but just personal) so if you want to know, write me on FB or something. 

Day 14.  Talk about role models.  Who are your role models?  How have they influenced you?: 

Obi-Wan Kenobi, Siri Tachi, Jaina Solo, Jude Watson, Matthew Stover, Ewan McGregor, Jensen Ackles, Misha Collins, etc.

Day 15.  Talk about identity.  How do you identify?  Autistic?  Asperger’s?  Person with Autism?  What’s your take on person/identity first language?: 

I identify as both austistic and as having aspergers. I prefer "autistic person" since it's not a big deal. Person with autism is silly and cumbersome to say. Though...I HATE HATE HATE people saying differently abled. It's just...NO (and most disabled people- physically or mentally- that I have heard speak on that sentence also think it's stupid). 

Day 16.  Talk about treatment.  Have you been through any therapies?  What ones did you like?  Which ones didn’t you like?  Do you think autistic people need therapy for their autism?: 

I have went to a psychologist and a counselor and neither helped much with anything :/ 

Day 17.  Talk about empathy.  Many people think autistics do not have empathy.  What’s your experience with empathy?  Are you hyper empathic or not empathic at all? : 

Okay, the empathy question. I think people get confused on what empathy means. Number 1, autistic people don't lack compassion or sympathy, we have loads of that. But the thing with empathy is...if we don't have that experience, we have trouble relating. Like, someone could be upset about something or be excited about something and I'll be thinking 'but why??' OR we might know someone is upset but we don't know what to do so we are silent. Or it's something far removed from us and we don't know how to react. But, honestly, we do care about people and I think people need to remember that. 

Day 18.  Talk about functioning labels.  What is your opinion about functioning labels?  Where are you on the spectrum?  If you don’t like functioning labels how would you describe your functioning ability?:

I do find functioning labels to be rude but I sometimes use them as a short-hand since I don't have better words to explain things. But I wish we could come up with better descriptors. 

Day 19.  Talk about your struggles and strengths.  What things are difficult for you because you are autistic?  What are the positives of being autistic?  Do you have a special skill or talent?: 

I have trouble with social conventions sometimes. I can hold short convos and long talks with people I am friends with, but otherwise I often make social blunders which are embarassing. Also, I have meltdowns sometimes and I also have sensory issues so I will be sitting there covering my ears or I will move away from people chewing/crunching loudly and people think I am being anti-social when really I am trying to avoid the noise driving me crazy. I also rant a lot and I can be..not nice when I am angry. 
Strengths? I am very resourceful and that has been commented on before. I also am good at my talents and I can read maps and get around places I have never been pretty decently. 

Day 20.  Talk about communication.  Are you verbal? Nonverbal? Partially verbal?  How do you usually communicate?: 

I am verbal. I like to talk a lot. I also like to write. 

Day 21.  Talk about comorbid conditions.  Do you have any other disorders commonly related to autism?  Were you misdiagnosed as something else first?: 

I also have OCD, which I was diagnosed with when I was 10.

Day 22.  Talk about autism parents.  How do you feel about this section of the community?  Do you feel as if they speak over you?  Do you find the term ‘autism parent’ rude or offensive?" 

I...haven't had a problem with them, to be honest. As long as they love their kids and let others talk, I welcome them in. 

Day 23.  Talk about your living situation.  Where do you live?  Do you live alone or with other people?  Are you happy with your current living arrangements?: 

Currently I am living at home but I plan on getting my own apartment after college. I will live alone until I get a boyfriend. 

Day 24.  Talk about the stereotypes and misconceptions that neurotypicals and allistics have. What stereotypes have you heard about autism?  How do you respond to people who have incorrect stereotypes about autism? What kind of things should people not say to autistic people?  What’s something you wish NTs/allistics knew about autism?: 

Well, once people know they often treat me like a baby, which is aggravating. I also know people will often think I am supper special or something dumb and like...I am not some freaking genius. UGH. I am smart, yes, but I'm not like...Einstein... 

What kinds of things should people not say? Well, I would rather the infantilizing stuff go FAR away. Also...I don't like how some dudes treat me like a child instead of a peer. Or when adults ignore me when I am trying to explain myself. Eh...

Day 25.  Talk about meltdowns/shutdowns.  Do you have them?  How often?  What are your triggers?:

I usually have meltdowns first, then they go into a shut down (though I can have shutdowns on their own). Metldowns usually are caused my stressful situations and things upsetting me. Shutdowns are usually caused by embarrassment. 

Day 26.  Talk about echolalia and scripting.  Do you use echolalia?  What about scripting?

I do use echolalia, yes, I have found. Sometimes I repeat things people have said or things I have said and I will often go over my plans to myself over and over. I do scripting too, as well, since it often helps me relate to things. Or I think it is funny >:D

Day 27.  Talk about eye-contact.  Do you make eye-contact?  Why or why not?  Does it make you uncomfortable?: 

I don't normally make eye contact but I will if I am in a situation I feel like it is a good idea I do OR I like-like the person. 

Day 28.  Talk about autism as a disability.  Do you think autism is a disability or a difference? Or both?  Do you feel more disabled by society than by your autism?:

It is a disability to me, yes. I don't like the idea of it being a different way of thinking. That's just ridiculous. It affects your BRAIN, it's not something you can freaking CHANGE like you can change your way of thinking. UGH. 
I feel like both disable me. Society doesn't help but I know that even if society was ok, I would still feel different and feel bad about it. 

Day 29.  Talk about executive functioning.  Do you experience executive dysfunction?  How do you deal with it?: 

Overall, my executive functioning is good but I do have times where I can't focus on anything and I procrastinate or I obsessively save pictures and stuff. 

Day 30.  Talk with pride. Are you proud to be autistic? How do you show the world your pride?: 

It's just a fact about me. Why would I be proud of it? That would be like being proud of being a woman or being white or being demisexual. It's something I am, not something I did. I'd rather be proud of what I do and what I create. Others may feel differently, but that's how I feel. 


  1. Good post, really interesting and informative. :) What are echolalia and scripting?

    1. Thank you! :) Echolalia is repeating noises and words and sentences that one hears or has said. Scripting is when one uses lines from TV shows or books in speech.