From the holo-diary of Aran Liander: Jedi Apprentice. Final entry

(I never did finish this fanfiction, so I thought I might as well finish it and give it a resolution :) Hope you enjoy!) (for 14/15 +) (Triggers for some hinted-at previous r-pe.)

The type of time keeping has changed since I last wrote. I'm going to stick with my way of measuring years and say 1005 ARR. That's all I have left of my past life, really, besides my lightsaber and the Force.

It's been so long since I last wrote to you, diary, and for that I am truly sorry. But I entered a really dark time and I was so ashamed to face you again, to face my Master again who was the one who placed you into my then-innocent hands. But now, as I hear the celebrations of the empire's fall outside, I realize I'm no longer the boy that made his way onto a terrible world and struggled with himself, with his loss, and with things he did not want to think about. I'm now nearly forty, almost the same age as my Master when he first chose me as his apprentice.

And, really, I believe it is time to face the last 23 years and tell you what has happened to me. I may not be the naive Padawan I was then, but I'm still very much a Jedi. And Jedi don't hide.

I still can't believe the empire has gone. I didn't help as much as I would have liked, but I still joined the rebellion, as a pilot, keeping my prowess to a minimum, to keep under the radar. But young Skywalker's bravery, his valor, his ending of the evil Siths holds me in awe. I've heard some snatches that he is the son of Anakin Skwalker, which I would undoubtedly believe- who else but the child of the Chosen One could take down the Chosen One and his Master? What will I do now, though? Now that the war is over, that the nightmare is over. Master, I know I am old enough, but I still don't feel wise enough to be a Knight- or even a Master. I can't even decide what route to take. I could restart the Jedi Order but I don't feel like that is my calling and the Force is silent to me. Young Skywalker, he would be a much better candidate. He is a true hero. Unlike me, a washed up Padawan stuck in a Knight's body. A Jedi Knight who couldn't even confront the Sith. I'd heard of others- other Jedi who had stood up. But most of them had died or been run offworld from the major worlds. Or worse. Maybe I did right. Maybe I didn't. I'll never know now.

Oh Master, I'm sorry I failed. I didn't do anything right. Or did I? Oh force, my mind keeps going in circles. Maybe I should just go through what transpired over the last twenty three years, to reorder my thoughts.

Yes, it was Kyla I saw on that day, on that dreadful world, which seems like so long ago now.

I can still remember that nasty meat stew I had made myself eat, still remember how I'd caught sight of her familiar hair by what was a brothel house, a place filled with the most disgusting of customers. I was convinced I was wrong, that I was seeing things in my all-consuming grief. But I'd gotten up, I'd rushed over there, breath held, sillily hopeful.

And I stopped dead when I realized I wasn't mistaken, that it was indeed my friend.

And she looked terrible. Gaunt cheeks, an outfit that barely fit her, her formerly muscular body now skeletal thin.

“Kyla?” I'd tentatively asked and she'd turned to me, her eyes the worst of it all. They were dead, gray, unseeing.

“Who's asking?” her voice was gruff, her eyes wandering up to the smoky sky where they seemed to catch onto the tangled knottings of smog and cloud above. I'd wanted to grab her, to take her shoulders, and I would have, but nausea at the last physical contact I'd received- Kayla's violence, her violation, blossoming before my eyes, tearing me to shreds, nearly sending me into a raging, sobbing ball of terror- stalled me.

“Kyla. It's me. Aran.” Her face swung towards me, eyes clearing just slightly, and she appeared to see me.

“Aran. What the kriff are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same question,” I whispered, tears suddenly clotting my eyes, vision blurred. I wanted to embrace her, but her wary stance, the recoiling her body made me decide it was probably a bad idea. Who knew how many bad things had happened to her since last I'd seen her.

“I thought you'd died.” Her voice sounds sorrowful, yet empty, all life sucked out of her. It wasn't just her body that looked like it had wasted away. Her spirit seemed to have done so as well. I swallowed, and gently reached out and tugged on her sleeve, being careful to not touch her skin.

“Come on, Kyla. Let's get out of this place. I'm sure we can find ourselves better jobs and leave this planet.”

But she wouldn't come. Her feet rooted to the spot and she wouldn't budge when I tried to get her to follow me.

“No, Aran. We can't. I tried. I attacked the Senate myself, along with some others. They all died and I fled, from system to system. I tried to find jobs but I was recognized from my folly. No one would take me. Except this trash heap. Give up. It's hopeless.” She turned away, black hair covering her face in a dark veil.

“Kyla, we can't give up! We have to carry on. Who will continue the Jedi Order if we don't?”

“You're lying, Aran. You don't really believe that.” Kyla's voice was hushed, a soft, gentle whisper, her old kindness surfacing, a strange fragility emanating from her. The Kyla I had grown up had been tough, rambunctious- immature yes, but still strong and kind- a better person than me, who had always been too curious for his own good, too anxious, too trusting. But that Kyla was gone, just like my old self was too gone. Had the empire really rendered us ghosts?

And it struck me that Kyla was right. In a way, I had given up hope. I'd tried not to, but I had. Otherwise, why was I even on this stupid planet? Why had I been weeping so much, why had I written in my journal about ….about what Kayla had done to me? Why had I punched that pole dancer I'd seen earlier that day? The old Aran, the one who was a good Jedi would never have done that, would never had even ventured near that place, looking for work.

The old Aran wouldn't have been so hurt, so decimated, so violated and ashamed, pushing things out of mind. The old Aran would have faced them head-on and not shoved them down, not shoved them so far down inside himself that he'd twisted his memories. That Aran would never have lied to himself.

I remember to this day, with violent recollection, how ill I'd felt at that realization, how it felt like she'd punched me in the stomach. I'd sunk to my knees, not caring that the mud squelched against my pants, smearing it's filth all over me. I was already dirty, wasn't I? I had given up. I'd lied to myself. I'd betrayed my inner self.

“Take this, Aran. And leave this place. Please.” I'd felt her enfold my fingers around some crumpled money bills, pressing them into my palm. I looked up at her, abruptly realizing that my face was damp, tears crawling sickly over my cheeks.

“Come with me, then. I can't do this without..without someone good. I need you, my friend.” Her bleak physiognomy briefly parted its clouds and she smiled.

“All right, Aran. Let's go. We can leave later.”

Of course, that's not what happened. My luck- which I don't believe in, of course, but it's the only word I can think of for this- just, well, you know, is pretty awful. I was so ecstatic, you wouldn't believe it, at being reunited with my friend. It even made the ghostly pain in my mouth, in my skull, fade away. Even the creepy man who I was sharing the room with- who had stared at us leeringly before falling into a snoring slumber- could take the feeling away from me.

“I thought you had died in that firestorm, that purge,” I had said to her as we huddled in the small corner I'd rented. We had booked passage on a vessel out of this system, away from this wretched world. I hadn't felt so hopeful in...well, since before the war, if I'm being honest. I was stupid to be too trusting, of course. I didn't notice how much Kyla had changed.

“I didn't- I escaped, albeit barely. My Master went to find you but when she did, and she didn't come back...well, I ran, like she told me too. Where is your Master? Did he-”

“Yes,” I'd responded quickly, a sour note entering into blissful emotions.

“I'm sorry, Aran,” she'd said, gazing disjointedly at the corner. I wanted to ask her why and how she had ended up in a brothel house, but I decided against it. She wasn't ready to talk about it, just like I wasn't with my sickening realization. She was more broken than I was, that much was obvious, and I would have to handle her, and myself, delicately. Our training was amazing, of course, but we had never been taught how to handle such terrible things, one after the other, watch our whole world crumple and rip itself part until there was nothing left. I kept babbling to her, about nothing really- actually, I can barely remember what I even said- but I do remember having a lighter sensation hovering in my chest, like maybe the worst was over.

I was wrong.

The next morning, I awoke to find my friend gone, as well as half the money, with just a note where her figure had once lain. I picked it up, paper rumpled and spotted with stains of some greasy substance. I don't want to relate it completely- it still hurts to think about it too much, even now- but it basically stated that she couldn't be around me anymore. That I reminded her of a happier past and that it hurt too much. And that she was sorry.

I don't know how long I cried, balled up on the floor, but it must have been a bit, and I must have been loud, because the creep snoring in bed was suddenly on me, shaking me, shouted obscenities wresting me from my despair. The man catching me weeping wasn't the bad part- that was fine, there was no harm nor weakness is tears- it was the contact, the rough grabbing of me around the arms. It brought those memories, that I'd forced from my mind, that I'd twisted into something different, something less and tamer, up from the ugly dregs of my soul, blaring them like a bullhorn so that they rattled in my skull.

The forced kissing hadn't been the only thing Kayla had done to me that day.....

This time, I wasn't held by a stun, and I lashed out, a force push gone so arry and sloppy that it could have been done with more finesse when I was three, striking the man- and various other things- back and away from me. The man was unconscious, everything in the room in disarray, and I knew I couldn't stay. How I fought through my heaving and sobbing to gather all of my belongings and flee I'll never know. But I got out, in a daze, and hurried to that ship I'd booked along with...Kyla.

Once aboard I didn't look back.

I know it's been years, but I still can't believe she left. I know I'm probably being selfish, but it still stings. I'd lost my other two best friends, and my Master, as well as my innocence and, well, that kind of innocence as well.... How could someone walk out on me like that? But then, Anakin Skywalker, who I thought was the Chosen One, turned out to be the man who killed my Master and many other Jedi and the nice, sweet girl I thought Kayla was turned out to be a psychopath who hurt me in such a way that I still...I..never-mind. I can't. I just.....

And no, I never heard from Ky- her again. I did hear that she died a month or two later in a firefight, saving a family- whose mother was a member of the rebellion- from an avenging wave of stormtroopers. All my friends are officially gone now....

As I stated earlier, I did join the rebellion as a pilot. I didn't do anything overly heroic, but I did save as many people as I could and I feel like I did my part. But still, I wish I could have served as a Jedi. Am I still even a Jedi?

I made no friends in the rebellion, though. Everyone must have seen my secrets inside of me, known that I wasn't like them, and shunned me. They weren't all cruel or anything- some were even amiable- but it was like they didn't want to get to close, lest I turn into a raging freak who “kidnapped people's children”. Or what other crap people believed about us.

Maybe I'll contact Ben and Natalie. Let them know what happened to that boy they took in so many years ago. I'll thank them for what they did for me, giving me a small bit of happiness after the Sith wrenched it away from me.

******

Ben and Natalie are officially the only people in the galaxy to still care for me. They were so old now but they seemed happy enough to hear from me. I apologized for not calling sooner, but they understood. They didn't even seem to care that I was a Jedi, which was a first.

I know I've sounded unfair- I know most people don't really hate me or the Jedi, but...I just...well, I still have fear about all of that after everything that happened to me. After my Master died and my home went up in smoke and my family died, almost everyone left me or hurt me. But Natalie and Ben have given me some hope....

* * * * * * *

Good news! I have heard that Luke Skywalker is planning to restart the Jedi Order. I can't quite believe it. I haven't even picked up my ligthsaber in years, its sight too heartbreaking. But here it is before me. A chance to reclaim my life, to pull myself from this choking smoke that had descended on my soul. I will join once I visit Natalie and Ben. I have let the young Skywalker know that I was once a Jedi and he seemed glad to have found another Jedi of old, someone who knew the old customs. I only hope I will be up to the task. I'm such a disappointment......

So, diary, I guess it's time for me to put a close on this chapter of my life. I embark on a new journey until I rejoin my Master and my friends and fellows once again in the Force.

Master, I'm so so sorry I wasn't able to do much, but I hope I've earned the rank of “Knight” which you bestowed on me.

I don't belong in this time, that much is certain, especially with how I hear Luke- or Master Skywalker I guess now- talking(he seems to think we should allow marriage amongst the Jedi Order- something that will be hard to watch). Natalie and Ben remember what it was like, oh so long ago, but I know they won't live for forever and eventually I'll have to say goodbye to them. Until then, I plan on visiting them as much as I can. They're the only family I now have and I owe that to them. The new Jedi Order might be a good fit, who knows, but it will never be home.

Because I don't have one.

(Goodbye)

Aran Liander

25 ABY

Jedi Master Aran Liander died at the age of 65 in one of the first battles of this war(which I'm going to tentatively name the “Yuuzhan Vong” war. Uncle Luke- I mean, Master Skywalker- hasn't decided what to call it yet, to be honest). Normally I wouldn't do this, it isn't in my department of expertise nor a part of my job, but since I was with him in the battle and heard his last words, I feel like it's my duty to do so. And what better way than to put it in the diary I was given? I didn't read it of course- I understand privacy and he was a very private man. But I do think, if anyone who cared about him were to want this diary, they deserve to know how he ended up.

Aran Liander was a loner but I did get to know him well enough on the few missions I went on with him. He was a kind soul, yet extraordinarily sad. He never married, nor had any kind of relationship with anyone, still clinging to his old ways. And while I couldn't understand it, I do get why in a way. I know I still tinker with ships and mechanics even though I don't need to. It's a way to connect me to my carefree(well, mostly) childhood. And we all need that, a tie to our innocent youth, a way to show us where we come from. So, I don't blame him. I just wish he could have had more happiness in his life.

Master Liander did train an apprentice- a female Twi-Lek- and she was the only one who could bring a smile to his face, bring a light into his eyes. He loved her so much, that much I could tell from what little we worked together.

Sadly he lost her in an earlier skirmish in the war. I think that's what finally broke him, what made his death so easy, so quick in the battle I emerged from relatively unscathed. He was a strong Jedi, he should have made it through.

As I stated above, I was there when he died- I caught him when he fell in fact, my friend Tenel Ka helping me to shield him from the firestorm that raged around him. It was then when I felt him palm something- a holo-diary- into my hands.

“Take it,” he'd whispered.

“Finish my story. I don't want to be forgotten. Please.” He'd passed soon after that, and my twin brother and I had carried his body into the ship as we'd made our escape, Tenel Ka and my other sibling covering us.

His words haunted me for quite some time. So much in fact, I went looking in the old archives Uncle Luke had managed to find for anything relating to him. I didn't find much, but I was able to glean two things. The first was an old, grainy, holo-vid of himself as a small child, a youngling in the Jedi Temple in the creche, playing with the other children in his clan(not sure which one it was). He had been so happy then- giggling, smiling, all adorable and happy like I know my aunt's nearly born baby will soon be. He looked even more different in the faded image I'd found, somehow still there from an old security camera. He'd been older here- no older than thirteen I'd guess- and just a Padawan. His face was serene in the picture, with a touch of nobility about it. However, there was a humble hint in his physiognomy, a sense that he, while aware he the regard he held in society, didn't view himself as better, as superior, than anyone else. He looked so, so different from the morose man I had known and worked with. He still had that spark of life in him then, that desire to be and to do good. How he survived such loss, I'll never know, Somehow, he, Master Kenobi, Master Yoda, and all the others I learned about and know dealt with it were able to go on after losing their family, their friends, their family, their whole lives. And even when they find it again, it's not the same, and it never will be. I know I could hardly bear it if I were to loose everything like that. I'll always respect their strength.

Okay, I lied earlier. I did read some of it, the last few lines. I didn't mean to, completely, but I felt like I should, since how could I finish his story if I didn't know what to write about. But that was all, I promise. And what I read was so very sad.

So Master Liander- Aran- if you can hear me or somehow can read this, I want to let you know. Your Master, your Padawan, they both loved you. I hope you know that. And you didn't fail. You were a good Jedi, and an honorable one. I believe, I believe your family is proud of you. And nothing was your fault.

And one more thing before I wrap your tale up and finally give it an end. You had a home here. You belonged. You may not have realized it, but I think it's important to for you to know that. We may have not been your Jedi Order, but I hope we were enough.

You will be missed

May the Force be with you

Jaina Solo

****

(later)

(Thank you)  

From the Diary of Aran Liander: Jedi Apprentice

982 ARR

We're going to be arriving today and I have a few things to tell you before we get there.

Number one is I'm sorry for not writing in here in such a long time- I've been really....I guess you could say 'despondent' lately and I don't feel like writing anything. It's all the same old stuff- my depression over Order 66, death, Kayla, my friends, and so on. The nightmares just get worse and I sometimes still feel a phantom pain in my mouth or in the back of my skull. I don't know how much more of this I can take...

Anyway, I tried to contact Ben and Natalie but I couldn't get through....or it might have been that they don't want to answer my comlink. I felt crushed that they would ignore me like this but in a way I'm glad they haven't answered. That way, I don't have to see the hate and shame in their eyes. I don't have to see the hatred.

Well, the bell just rang, so that means we're here. I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

I wasn't able to buy anything with my measly amount of crumpled credits so I was forced to comb the streets for currency, like I did after Order 66. I used what little I could find to rent a corner in a room since I don't have enough to buy a full room. The man I'm 'rooming' with is a middle aged man about my Master's age and roughly human; all comparisons to my Master end there, however. He is dirty, grunge-faced, with darting eyes that I find very unsettling. I think I completely understand girl's wariness now, especially after Kayla. If that instance has taught me anything, it has taught me about the monsters inside certain people and how it can take away everything that makes them alive. I don't want to loose hope but...but I can't believe in living beings anymore.

Damn Kayla, why did you take my last bit of Jedi out of me?! You gutted me and left me for dead! You took something away from me that I'll never get back now and how can I be a Jedi if I have this big burning hatred for everything in myself?! I HATE YOU!!

….

I'm so, so sorry. I'm sorry. I won't do it again, I promise, I promise, okay?

Since I don't have anymore currency with which to pay my owner and rent is tomorrow, I went job scoping. So far I've managed to piss off several store owners when they tried to pickpocket me, and totally humiliate myself when I punched a pole dancer in the face when she made a move on me.

And now, I'm sitting in a wretched restaurant eating an unrecognizable-meat stew from some place that takes credits. I've been looking at job opportunities, not believing I'm doing this, and I have some ideas which I'll write down now.

1 – I could be a body guard or something- I am very skilled in combat and my Force sensitivity would definitely be a bonus. And it would definitely be better than every other karking job here that is crooked and, quite possibly, immoral. I may have sunk far, but I'm NOT going to betray myself anymore than I already have.

2 – I could-....Oh, who am I kidding, I'm a Jedi! I can't do anything on this damn, rotten world! I shouldn't have come here, I know I shouldn't have! It was stupid. And now I'm stranded here...alone..

Wait, that girl over there by the brothel house....she looks familiar..

Oh...

Oh my Force, is that Kyla? What's she doing here? Didn't she die, didn't-?

Forget this, I'm getting a closer look.

Aran Liander 

From the Holo-diary of Aran Liander: Jedi Apprentice

982 ARR

I saw a medic on the ship who administrated bacta to me yesterday; I could tell she wanted to know where I got my injuries from but I was thankful she fought the impulse. While I'm still in pain, it isn't as sharp as it was; I am especially glad that the wound to my skull is looking much better now. That bacta immersion definitely helped.

I began having nightmares again- this time it was a replay of the brutal killing of the Jedi and Kayla's...craziness(which was so disturbing...). I awoke last night, covered in a sweat, and hearing the sound of my screams echoing my ears. At breakfast this morning I saw several people glaring at me and I guess I woke them up with my cries last night.

I feel like such a piece of poodoo.

That reminds me, I have chosen a planet to stay on. Well, not really a planet; it's actually a moon, a moon called “Nar Shaddaa” which orbits the Hutt world of Nal Hutta. I can't believe I'm going to the smuggler captial of the galaxy but I think it will be a good place to get lost in for awhile. The imperial leader, from what I learned by doing research last night, is very lax on keeping order on the world(he's most likely paid off handsomely by the Hutts). I don't know when I'll leave that moon but I should be there for awhile since my escape will have most likely caused the Empire to want to search for me- not that I'm important, it's just that they want all Jedi dead.

Oh no, I just saw some stormtroopers.

Sorry I had to abandon you like that. I returned to my room after seeing a few stormtroopers enter the dining hall and I had to run for it. Luckily, they didn't see me sprint out of there.

I'm debating on whether or not to contact Natalie and Ben to tell them that I'm okay. They seemed to care about me while I was staying with them but I don't know if they are on my side or not.

I shouldn't! Just look at Kayla! I trusted her and she turned into a total creep. I think I hate romance even more now than I used to. I'd seen and heard about people behaving that way but I never expected to actually meet someone I cared about be that way. I never expected to see someone I cared about be fine with murder just to get at someone. Calling them would be a terrible mistake, wouldn't it diary?

I wish I had another Jedi to talk to- they'd understand me, they'd get this fear I have that I've been loosing it all again, just like I did after Order 66. They'd understand my fear and help me control and accept it.

And I wish that Jedi was my Master.

I also wish I could see my friends Kyla, Lint, and Rune. After seeing Kayla betray my trust in such a horrifying way I want that innocent, kind, complete trust I had with my friends. I miss our quiet talks, sitting together in meditation, all connected.

But missing won't help them or me now, will it?

I was lucky enough to have had such good friends and such a good Master in my life. I shouldn't expect to have anymore. I may not be fine but I have my lightsaber and the Force is with me.

Well, I'm off to meditate on the terrible things that happened yesterday. I still haven't been able to get them out of my mind- my heart and mouth won't stop hurting, and I can't think about anything without beginning to feel nauseous. Wish me luck.

May the Force be with me in my new home when I get there and lend me the patience to live in such settings.

Aran Liander 

From the Holo-diary of Aran Liander: Jedi Apprentice

(Here you go, Solace and Covert Knight, just as promised :D)

982 ARR

There is a dead Jedi lying in my room and I can't stop shaking, the terrible noise echoing in my hearing like a thousand booming drums, going on forever and ever and ever and.......

The door swinging open before me, I had nearly thrown up when I saw her, when I saw Kayla, grinning savagely down at me from the opening.

“Hello sweetie, did ya miss me?” All the kindness she had once had was gone, as was that fractured pain I'd seen in her eyes when I'd been taken. I had tried to speak then but my throat hurt too much so I just nodded. Smiling even wider, Kayla had sauntered in and leaned down over me, her hair brushing my cheeks.

“You don't look so good, Aran, dear. Why I ever liked you is a mystery to me.” The bitterness in her voice had clenched in my heart so that I had cleared my throat and forced myself to speak.

“So-, so you work for the empire now, do you, Kayla?” She had backed up, blanching for a second before she grinned again, driving that speck of vulnerability off her face as if it had never been.

“Are you lonely, Aran?” she asked after a moment. Of course I was lonely but then, as I do now, knew I couldn't exactly tell her that. I couldn't tell anyone. No one would understand. So, instead of answering, I'd just turned my head away and shut my eyes.

“Aran, answer me! If you don't, I'll do something horrible.” I am ashamed to say, I didn't believe her. No matter the horrid betrayal I had witnessed at her hands, I still believed she wasn't capable of extreme cruelty. How wrong I was. How wrong....

“Oh, don't wanna talk, do you? Well, I can fix that. Troopers, bring him in.” I heard the door pushed farther open and after a second, a scuffling, dragging noise. I had parted my lids slightly to see two stormtroopers march in, carrying a limp figure, the head hanging, between them- and the figure was in Jedi robes. I had gasped, cowering instinctively, fighting the urge to take my lightsaber from my pack. Kayla had approached me again, crouching and leaning forward, that vulnerability back on her face so that she almost looked like my friend from school.

“Aran, please, say you like me. PLEASE.” she had grabbed my hand and pressed it to her mouth; I was so tired and freaked out, I didn't even resist. I had glanced at the seemingly-boneless Jedi, searching for any indication that they were alive. I'd seen their caved-in chest moving up and down rapidly and I took a breath of relief- they were alive. Then it had hit me, so hard I nearly doubled over. A Jedi was captured and apparently badly hurt. I had to do something, I had to. Out of the corner of my eye, I'd seen something flashing towards my face and before, in my sluggish feeling mind, I could stop it, Kayla's hand was a tight vice around my face.

“Aran, don't look at that wretched thing. Look at ME.” Her face was hard and her eyes filmed over with thick tears, somehow a fire burning in the water.

“That is a Jedi, Kayla, an alive, sentient, being. What do you want?” her lips had pursued and my stomach had twisted into a million knots. I'd had a very bad feeling, right then. I should have listened.

“Say you want me.” In another time, I would have laughed, embarrassed, while simultaneously feeling ill but then I'd just felt saddened.

“I'm sorry. I like you as a friend, but I don't like you in that way.” her face had crumpled then, the skin flushing crimson as she began to sob. I had reached out to touch her shoulder to comfort her, to apologize, to get her to stop sobbing. But before my fingers had reached her jumpsuit sleeve, a hard, stinging palm crashed into my already sore jaw, jerking my head sideways.

“Shut up, you kriffed up barve, just shut up!” she'd screamed, backing away from me, hands slipping into her pockets.

“Kayla, do you want me to-?” one of the troopers asked, their voice different then that of the engineered clones. This must be a recruit. Maybe even one who knew Kayla well.

“Say it or I'll have you killed!” she'd screeched shrilly, cutting the trooper off.

I met Kayla's agonized gaze, my heart aching in my chest.

“You won't do that, Kayla. I know you and you're not a killer.” One hand slid out from her pocket, the bloodless, pallid fist gripping onto a blaster. Shakily, she'd leveled it towards me.

'She's better than this. I know she is.' Grunting and gritting my teeth against it, I'd managed to push myself to my throbbing feet, raising my hands over my head.

“Kayla, stop. I'm sorry but you can't do this. You have no idea what killing will do to you, especially if you haven't mastered yourself. I know. I know and its the worst feeling in the universe.” Squeezing her hands even tighter around the handle of her blaster, she had glared at me with something that looked almost crazed. Panic had gripped me.

“Satana was right. You want her and not me.”

“Kayla, that isn't true-”

“I said SHUT UP!” I faced her, willing her with every fiber of my being to stand down, to lower the weapon. But she didn't. Instead she smiled again, a smirk, a horrible, twisted grimace.

“Landy, initiate phase two will you?” The trooper, the one who had spoken so familiarly with Kayla, nodded.

“Yes, ma'am.” Kayla turned her face back to me, all vulnerability gone.

“Well, if you don't want me then I'll make you.” I saw her hand jerk at something in her gun and I wanted to use the Force, so badly it hurt like a bruise on my heart, but I'd known I couldn't- I couldn't let any of them die. I locked eyes with her, reaching out a hand, knowing what she was about to do and screaming in my mind for her not to.

“Kayla, no-” The stun dart hit me, a numbing, dizzying sensation sending me dropping to my knees. Through my blurring vision I looked up at the Jedi and saw that it was a human male and a Knight by the looks of it. Suddenly, as if he sensed me staring at me, he looked up, his eyes baring his soul. Then recognition lit his face and a deep understanding filled his ancient-seeming irises.

“Aran?” he whispered, his voice a thick slurry in my hearing. Then, behind him, I heard a shot and those eyes, that face, was gone in a shower of blood and gore, the now, nearly-headless body falling forward, soaking in puddle of their own leakage.

And through the fuzziness, through the clouds clotting my brain and eyes, through the sludge in my blood, an emotion had exploded up through me and I'd screamed in painful denial and horror, reaching forward with agonizingly slow hands, the sound howling around me and I'd fallen to my hands and then my face when my elbows buckled beneath me.

A foot had gently eased me onto my back right before a heavy weight descended onto my lower stomach. I had looked up and through my tunneling vision I'd seen Kayla leaning over me, a warped grin stretching her lips into a terrifying grimace. Her hands fisted into my robes, her knuckles grinding into my chest.

“I wanted you was all. All you had to do was be like all other guys and at least want me back. But you couldn't, could you, you damn Jedi. So, since you won't want me, I guess I'll just have to do it for you. You know what rejection feels like? Well, I'm going to make you damn well FEEL IT!”

And she'd leaned forward. I'd tried to move, tried to turn my face away, to squirm free from her but I couldn't move, my limbs were completely immobile. I wanted to scream, to black out but I wasn't, I wasn't. She came closer, much, much closer then I ever wanted, and there wasn't anything I could do to stop it.

Now, as I write this, hugging my torn shirt to me and staring at the remains of his mangled, gory-smothered face, I realize I knew the dead man in the room. He'd been a healer, a kind soul who had looked after me during times I'd been injured- I'd even been taught my him. He was one of the most peaceful persons I'd ever met, he'd even refused to carry a lightsaber. And since the numbing agent injected into me has gone, I can't stop crying. I'd finally found another Jedi and he was killed becayse of my poor judgement. A good man was dead and it was all my fault since I had trusted in Kayla's goodness. I should never have trusted her. I couldn't trust her or anyone, not anymore, especially since I was considered pure evil in this galaxy we all lived in. Even the best of people could have a monster in their heart. Like Kayla. No wonder the Jedi preached so much about the temptations of the darkside and the temptations of the flesh. Now I fully and truly understand why attachment is forbidden.

I now know I have to escape. No one else can die because of me and I can't let anything like that happen again; not the death and not what Kayla did to me. My mouth still hurts and when ever the pain crosses my radar, I feel sick in my stomach. I never wanted to be kissed, never wanted to break the code, but she'd stolen that from me and I feel like I lost something I will never get back. Did I even break the code? Did I?

Okay, I need to think. I have to escape. Kayla promised to come back and from the vehemence and crazed emotion in her voice, I know what will happen cannot be good.

Hey, you know that idea I had earlier? Maybe I'll try it. Maybe if I just...HIT at my scalp....

* * * * * * *

So many things have happened today, diary, and I feel it is only right that I transcribe it all in here.

I did the thing I promised myself I would never do- cause physical injury to myself. But I swear, I had no choice. Digging with the hilt of my lightsaber, I'd managed to pull the chip in my head out, holding my mouth shut as hard as I could to keep myself from throwing up. Dizzy from the remaining remnants of the drug and the blood coursing down the back of my head, I'd gathered my bag and clipped my lightsaber to my belt. As I headed towards the door, I tore off my shirt and wrapped it around my skull, blood immediately beginning to soak through it.

I'd taken a deep breath and ignited my lightsaber and stabbing into the invisible door. Hearing a hiss behind me, dioxys flooding the room, I quickly cut a hole in the white plasteel and climbed through the burning hole.

“Prisoner, stop immediately and hold up your hands!” I turned and saw the stormtrooper who had spoken to Kayla, who had killed the Jedi. I swung around, slashing the blade into his gun and spun, slamming my heel into his breastplate, sending him flying.

Klaxons wailing, I'd sprinted down the passage, weaving on jelly legs, my wounded body beating in time with my heart. Storming footsteps clamored behind me and I ran even faster, the forever gray walls swaying and smearing before me. I'd known I had to find a way to hide before they found me. I'd known that, in my pathetic state, I wouldn't have stood a chance. I couldn't even stop Kayla...

I had spied a air duct, just large enough to occupy my emaciated form. Tearing it from the wall, I'd crawled inside and replaced it before taking off down the cramped passage as quietly as I could on my hands and knees, blinking the blood dripping into my eyes; the scarlet droplets reminding me of the dead man back in my cell. I didn't even give him a burial....

Somehow I forced myself not to think about it as I pushed myself along, alone, alarms and the stamping of boots growing into a cacophony of unbearable sound. Somehow, I found the exit in the maze of narrow passages and got away, blood leaking onto my bare shoulders and onto the bottom of the tunnel.

As I'd stepped out into the weak light of dawn, a cold wind had swept passed me and I shivered, wishing I could put on my Jedi top but knowing it was a stupid idea. Of course, I had to wear something so I dug out that oversized shirt I'd gotten during my desperate days on the streets and pulled it over my head, the cloth hanging off me like a second layer of skin. I knew I had to find a ship and I had to find one fast. The only problem was- How?

Suffice to say, I did find myself a ship- a large one carrying over a thousand passengers, all poor, all as desperate as I, maybe even more so. I used the last of my credits to get the small, cramped room that will be my home until I get off.

I don't know which planet to try but I looked at a list on the ship's data-board before I'd boarded. Maybe I'll look over it again after dinner and pick one out; I don't care what its like as long as its far, far away from Coruscant and the Empire. Maybe I can even find other Jedi like myself out there in the darkness of space, though I doubt it.

Now I'm standing in one of the large galleys, staring at the humongous, wall-spanning transparisteel window, watching as Coruscant grows smaller and smaller in the viewport, watching as my Master, my home, my dead friends, and a lost Order vanish from my sight forever. I can't stop weeping because I know I will never come back, not now that all my pain festers on the beautiful and cruel world below. I hate that I think this but I almost hate the world below that had been my home and light once upon a time. There are too many cruel people and even though I know it's not everyone, I somehow can't except that right now. I have much to work on. I thought I could somehow take on the Empire but I was wrong.

Goodbye Master, I'm sorry. I failed you, I failed all of you. And now I will forever atone for it.

Aran Liander 

From the Holo-diary of Aran Liander: Jedi Apprentice

982 ARR

I didn't know that physical pain could be this agonizing. Emotional hurt is still worse, but I am still thankful I was taught how to endure flesh pain as a Jedi initiate. I just wish I had the Force....I miss it.

As you can see, we have passed into standard another year and I spent that day in the wallows of this Corellian hell-hole. I heard that it was New Years Eve last night as I was taken back to my cell, bloody but still defiant; they may have taken much from me but they will NOT take my dignity.

I spent the night working out the jams in my body; I even had to pop a few things back into place- not something I relish doing. While nursing the bruises and tears in my flesh, I had thought back to what I'd been doing last year at this time. The war had been going on, of course, but I'd been with my Master and the Jedi Order had still been alive and well, if a little battered. And....I'm ashamed to say it, but I wish the war was still going on, if it meant I could have one more minute with my Master.

I know, I know it's wrong but I can't help it. I just want to go somewhere- anywhere, but here.

The beating was even more worse than usual today. They still haven't hurt me as much as that first day- I still fight back but the chip in my head just about kills me every time. In fact, I think I will have this mind-rattling ache on my brain perpetually. I wonder if the reason they were extra vicious today was because of the new year and they want to impress their pug-faced Imperial instructor. Not that it matters; the bruises on me are still black and huge and the cut on my forehead keeps on opening up and leaking blood.

I think I'll try to go to sleep. I haven't figured an escape plan out yet so hopefully rest will rejuvenate my brain a bit. All I can really focus on now is everything that is burdensome in my life.

There is no emotion, there is peace.

There is no emotion, there is peace.

* * * *

I have an idea for escape but I don't know if it's a good one since it goes against something I swore I'd never do again. I might have to cut this chip out of my skull. I have a lightsaber so it IS possible but I told myself I'd never inflict physical harm on myself ever again. The memory of that moment of insanity, that moment where blood had blossomed from my arms and run down me in rivulets and how I'd actually felt better for a second makes me feel violently ill.

But it may be the only way for me to get out of here. I have many reserves of strength at my disposal but without the Force I don't know exactly how long I will survive. I could hold out for a life time, I know that, but what about my mind? How long till it cracks? I was knighted but my training was far from complete. How the hell am I supposed to know how much I can endure?

Sorry for the language, I'm just really, really worried.

Uh oh, I hear footsteps. Why are they back, it's not even morning yet.

* * * *

I have a bad feeling about this. It's a Jedi cliche, I know, but I can't help but say it since it IS true. Several stormtroopers are standing outside by my door and I have know idea WHY.

I hear something. Footsteps coming. It is a light sound- not the heavy tromping of imperial boots. Who would be here besides Imperials? Who could it b-

Oh my Force, NO!

Aran Liander  

From the Holo-diary of Aran Liander: Jedi Apprentice

                                         981 ARR

I hurt so much that I can barely write this. My lip is bloody and I think I broke something in my torso- I don't know, it all hurts so much.

I'm still in the cell, if you're wondering. But of course you're not wondering, your a diary. Whatever. Well, since, besides my lightsaber and the Force, your my only friend, I guess this will all have to do. I can't hope for anything better, can I?

This morning I was jolted into wakefulness by an abrupt and ear-shattering klaxon, the siren rattling me so hard, my vision went grainy as I had surfaced into instant awareness. And just as quickly as it began, the alarm stopped. The almost invisible door, which I'd found last night, swung open and several stormtroopers came inside- all armed with revolving, repeating machine guns. The leader had pointed his gloved finger at me.

“Don't even think of trying to escape passed us, Jedi scum. You can't use your precious Force in here and if you try anything with that little lightsaber of yours, this room will be flooded with dioxys and you will die. Do you understand?”

I'd swallowed and nodded, feeling my pack resting against my leg and wishing I could take everything inside and escape, fun far away from this hell the blasted Sith had concocted. Head for the stars and never look back.

One stormtrooper, the lowest in rank, set a bowl on the floor and kicked it towards me.

“Eat quickly.” I pulled the dish towards me and peered at its contents- orange gunk pounded into a kind if paste with sprinkles of green and brown flecks. It looked like rot made manifest, a growth of pure decay and evil- just like the Sith. My stomach rebelled and instead of eating, I looked up at the troopers, and said “What are you going to do to me?”

Since my usage of the Force was hampered, I was stunned when the lead trooper's boot came crashing into my side, sending me wheezing to the floor.

“You will find out soon enough, Jedi. Now eat or we'll take you with us and you can just deal with being hungry.” Glaring, I snatched up the bowl and scarfed down the vile filth. It was so gross that I nearly vomited it back up again. After I'd finished, two of the troopers hauled me roughly to my feet and clicked two Force-cuffs around my wrists, before shoving me down the hallways to a large room. The space was large with things littered around it that appeared to be used for physical training.

A large crowd of young people, between the ages of seven to thirty five, stood in a corner, all dressed in military fashion. They were mostly human males, though I did see a few human females. It seems like the reports I'd heard were true- the Empire was a racist, sexist pit of bile with the biggest bigots and bullies in charge.

I looked over at the crowd's faces and saw something that chilled me to the very bone- every single one of them lacked compassion of any kind. It had been stamped out of them. My stomach dropped out of my body as the stormtroopers shoved me closer to the group.

They forced me to stand on a circle in the gray floor, off to my right, I heard a door open. I felt the stormtroopers behind me snap to attention and I saw the students before me do the same, their hands rising in perfect synchronization as they saluted. In through the door came a tall, hallow-cheeked Imperial-dressed man walk in followed by Darth Vader. This must not have been typical since I saw fear flicker across a small boy's face.

The man in military garb strode forward and began to address the students. I'm ashamed to say that I began to shake at his words. I was to be used by them as a target- to help them in abusing, and eventually killing, Jedi. The military man spun around and came towards me and stood so close his medal-studded chest almost brushed my nose.

“Listen, thing. We're going to remove those Force-cuffs but that doesn't mean you can run off. We have a chip in your head and if you try to escape, or try to hurt an Imperial, you will be rendered immobile. You are hear for them to learn. You will not cry, you will not beg, you will not speak to them, and do not expect mercy for that is not the way of the strong. Now on your knees.”

The stormtroopers behind me slammed their hands into my shoulder blades and I fell. I felt the Force-cuffs come free but with a sickening, sinking feeling, I knew escape was hopeless, at least for the time being.

What happened next was so horrific that it ranks up there with Order 66 and the Clone Wars.

The Imperial leader gave them a signal and I was suddenly hit from behind by an electric shock and I found myself running. I looked over my shoulder and saw the mass of Imperials spreading out and melting into the holo-enviroment that shimmered into being. I wasn't running in a cold, metallic room anymore- I was in some sort of jungle with tall trees, hot air, and a rancid stink that rose up around me, almost like fissures of gas spewing up their filth from under a planet's skin. I came to a stop and looked around, trying to access the Force and instead sent to the ground, my head flooded with unbearable pain.

I came to myself, curled up on the ground, a moment later and stood back up. Since I couldn't use the Force, I had tried using my heightened senses as I had been taught to do as a child. Off to my right I'd heard the sound of someone attempting at being sneaky and as I peered into the gloom I saw a human male in his early twenties tiptoeing at a crouch towards me.

Looking behind me, I slipped around the huge trunk of a holo-tree. I heard a loud rustle and saw the man leap into full view, the fake light sending his face into stark relief and the emptiness in his eyes saddens me more than I could ever believe. The Empire as not only hurt the Jedi, the poor, the civilians, and I, but even the Imperials themselves. They had been robbed of themselves by the Sith.

Suddenly, I'd heard a rustle of leave over my head and I saw another man leaping down towards me. I broke into a sprint, quickly outrunning both men, even without having the ability to draw on the Force.

I finally stopped and leaned down, hands to my knees, to catch my breath. Then it happened. I'm not sure what it actually was- all I remember was pain slamming into me from all sides. Every-time I tried to strike back and fend off their attacks, a blinding agony was split my mind in two and render my sight to flames of white.

When it all ended, I was staring, aching and bloody, up at a circle of stone-faced Imperials. Anger, so much anger, boiling in my insides, came rushing up and I heard a vicious voice in my head shouting 'NOO' over and over again.

Pushing through the pain, pushing with all my might, I leapt to my feet and rushed passed them, punching one hard in the face as he tried to grab me, and screamed with pain as I ran, white fire erupting all around me as I sped away. The shouts of bullies denied their prey had followed me in a howl of roaring noise. Several Imperials tried to grab me but I didn't let them hurt me those time, no matter how much I inflicted on myself. I soon screamed myself hoarse, and then silent, my voice giving way but I kept running and kept fighting back. Because I wasn't going to let them win. Not again.

I must have eventually passed out because I found myself back in the cell, my head pounding and blood all over me.

I must escape soon. I have too.

Aran Liander. 

My Summer Vacation Day 9: Celebration VI part 2

(My sister, Shaak Ti, and I) 

     Celebration VI post Part 2! :D :D Sorry for not continuing the posting for so long. I've been crazy busy and it looks like it isn't going to let up for a while. Though, I will be making time to post now, so it's all good :D

I got up on this morning and ate a quick breakfast of bacon and eggs(I think) and we left earlier so we 

could take my Mom and brother to Animal Kingdom before heading to CVI. When we got there

we boarded a bus that took us on a roundabout way to the place we'd been let at the day before. 

We got into line like we did yesterday and this time, on the inside lines, we got to be at the front of the 

one we were in which I thought was really cool :). While in line, we saw Anthony Daniels(C3PO)

walk passed(Hey, look, it's Anthony Daniels XD <---I said that when I saw him). 

As we waited for the doors to open, my Dad started talking to these two guys about Star Wars Detours 

and I quickly jumped into the conversation. We talked about Star Wars, the Darth Plagueis novel,

(he gave me a high five when I said I liked it), Jaina Solo, SW:TCW, actors, fanfiction, and how girls 

in Star Wars, especially the Jedi, shouldn't dress so skimpily. The one I talked to mainly

was very nice and it was cool because he talked to me like a peer which doesn't happen very often.

When we got out of line, we went up to the Her Universe photo shoot to model for her shirts. Even 

though I'm not really into her shirts, I love that Ashley is making Science Fiction shirts for girls

and that she wanted actual Star Wars fangirls to be models for her clothing. 

               

                                                                                       
                                  Jedigirl and Asala were nice enough to let my sister and I model with them(we wouldn't have been able to otherwise since the schedule was already full). They had the four of us stand on a bench of sorts and told us how to stand. I never thought I'd model(it's not something I've ever wanted to do) but since it was for Star Wars clothing, I'm perfectly fine with it XD. I think it's pretty cool
that the Her Universe logo is in the corner of the pictures(we're also on the Facebook page! :D).

            

                                               
                            A little bit later, all the Lakehouse girls who'd come squeezed onto the bench
                       and we took a group photo which was also pretty cool. I asked Ashley afterwards where the               pictures were going to be used and she told me that they'd be on the Facebook page and that some would be used for promotions of shirts on the site and other places(I'd like to have mine used but I doubt it will :p). We waited around for a bit since there was something Fallon and some of the other girls wanted us all to see. We saw some members of the Jedi Assembly give an award to Ashley Eckstein for the help she has given a lot of fangirls with her role as Ahsoka and her creation of Her Universe. She does deserve it since she has done much in helping a lot of fangirls and is against bullying, but I'm not one of those fangirls. I was comfortable with myself being a Star Wars fan long before TCW came out and having grown up reading about such girl Jedi like Jaina Solo, Siri Tachi, Scout(Tallisibith Enderwung-Esterhazy), Tenel Ka Chume Ta' Djo, Tahiri Veila, and the like, I never felt a lack of female Jedi to read/hear about and relate too(and pretty much all the girl Jedi are awesome; the only one I don't like is Etain).

                                                
                                                 Asala cropped this image for my sister and I so we could have a picture of just us(thank you!). Also, I can really tell the people doing the shots edited me in this picture :p.

                                   My sister, Queen Amidala, and I. This girl had several Padme costumes on during the day and I have to say - BEST PADME COSPLAYER THERE! :D Everything seemed so realistic, even the hair which can definitely be hard to do. She also looked close enough to pull off the look :)


                                   The Lakehouse girls taking a picture in a doorway in the Death Star.

                       After we left the photoshoot, the rest of the Lakehouse girls and I went down to the Exhibit Hall to take pictures and to look around. We took several pictures, like the one above, for fun. :D

                                       My sister and I sneaking around the Death Star.




                                         Here is another picture of us cramming into the opening. And oh no, look, a Stormtrooper and a Sith Lord!!! We must fight them XD (Arda and I took care of her XD) And the Stormtrooper almost jumped on us >:)

                                  Here we all are cramming into the Action Figure picture-taking set-up we'd seen the day before. It was quite fun and we were all laughing when we did this.

                                           Shaak Ti as an Ahsoka action figure(she had a great costume).

                            Since we all wanted to do different things, my sister, dad, and I split off to do our own shopping. My sister went and bought two Celebration VI exclusive t-shirts(we barely got there in time to get the right size) which you will see me wearing in a later post(I wore it to on later on during vacation). We wandered around, looked at the different booths, and found out when you could get these special cards. Then we headed over to the Barnes and Noble booth to see when the author signing were. When we got there we saw that Drew Karpyshyn was signing!!! :D :D He's the author of the Darth Bane trilogy, The Old Republic: Revan, and also was major in creating the story lines of both KOTOR games. There were several authors I would have loved to have meet and he was one of my top choices and since he was there I decided to get a book signed by him. I bought a copy of Darth Bane: Rule of Two(since I already owned the first book) and got into line(there were two and I got into the much shorter of the two lines). While in line, I talked to this one college aged girl and we discussed Star Wars and the EU and she agreed with me that the EU was better than The Clone Wars(yes, someone who agrees with me!!! :D :D That is quite rare to find). She was really nice and I enjoyed getting the chance to talk to her.  I also talked to a guy in line briefly who was reading the Revan novel(which I've already read) and I told him he would like it. As I got close to the front of the line, this lady asked me if I wanted to have a special message written to me in the book(I told her how to spell my name to make sure it was spelled correctly). She also gave me a political bumper sticker with Plagueis and Sidious on it(It said "There is No Hope"). I thought it was quite clever and funny, though I definitely know I wouldn't vote for those guys EVER.

                       I finally got to go up and get my book signed. Mr. Karpyshyn asked how I was enjoying myself while he signed the book which was really cool. I was very happy to finally get a book autographed by an author I really liked(if you haven't read them yet, you really should give his Darth Bane trilogy a read, they are very good!!!).

                                    After signing my book, he asked if I wanted a picture and since I did, my Dad quickly snapped a photo with my phone. He then shook my hand and said nice to meet you and I responded likewise.

                                                             A Clone cosplay

                                          The 501st Legion getting set up for a large photo shoot.

                        We left the Exhibit Hall and went to the lunch area to meet back up with the girls to have lunch together(they were sitting on the steps). We got there a little late but it was okay. I had the girls sign the Star Wars diary I had brought with me and I sat and talked while I ate my sandwich.

                   While eating lunch, a whole lot of Sith and Stormtrooper cosplayers came over to take pictures on the steps and mingle around for a bit. And while I'm by no means a Sith or Dark Side user, I have to admit, the Sith and Stormtroopers costumes were marvelous. Everyone looked like they'd worked very hard on their costumes and it was a joy to sit there, a Jedi Padawan, watching as the Sith Lords strolled around(my sister, Arda, and I were joking that we were in hiding and saying that "we'll just sit here and pretend we got lost and they hopefully won't try and fight us" XD). I was really impressed with the Asajj Ventress costumes; the woman who were cosplaying her all did wonderful jobs with the costume; each one  was unique but each and everyone of them looked like Ventress. So cool! :D

                                                    A Count Dooku cosplay. He did a very good job :D

                                        An awesome Darth Sidious/Emperor Palpatine cosplay. You can't really see here but he had a really good, realistic face. I really wish I'd had a better camera than my phone.

                                   Two Darth Mauls and a Savage Oppress. There were some really epic cosplays of these guys. I saw one Darth Maul in the legs you see him using in The Clone Wars and it was really cool, and really well done! :D.

                                                Stormtroopers standing in formation for a picture. :)

                                               Stormtroopers with their helmets all on.

                                 Darth Maul, Savage Oppress, and Count Dooku

                         Sith Lords getting ready to have their pictures taken. Not a good place to be a Jedi.

                               Asajj Ventress and Darth Vader cosplayers. I LOVE her costume!! :D :D I really thought this was such a cool picture.

                                                 A Clone Commando cosplay.

    Me and Savange Oppress. He was nice enough to take a picture with me before we began our epic duel.
                           
               While I was eating lunch, I saw the above man in his Savage Oppress cosplay walking around and eventually going to stand over in the passage behind me. And though I'm not a fan of Savage at all, his costume was so totally epic I couldn't help looking at it and wanting a picture of it. I mean, come on, it's SO COOL!! :D
Finally, I plucked up the nerve, and went over to him, hoping to get a picture, and said "Your costume is awesome!" He was very thankful(he was kind of gushing with thanks, actually XD). After a little bit I asked if I could get a picture of him and he said "You want to take a picture with me?" I said yes and handed my phone to a friend of his. I told her how it worked, and we posed for the picture. As we did, he held his clawed hand RIGHT beside my face and said "Jedi!" in a very good Savage style voice(creeeeepy >:) ). We got a great picture and I thanked him and he told me that my costume was really well done :D :D :D :D He was very nice. When I came back over we joked that I'd betrayed the Jedi Order by having a picture with a dark side user.

                                    My sister also wanted a picture with this awesome cosplayer.

                                       After lunch, we boarded a bus to drop off our merchandise to our car, before heading back to the Convention for more fun. This bus had The Phantom Menace playing on the screens so we got to watch some of that film as we drove.

                               You can't go to a Star Wars Convention and not a get a picture with Darth Vader so when we came back to the Convention Center, we looked around for a Vader to take a picture with. This man was nice enough to stop and take a picture with us. I got to meet another Sith Lord!! Yay! I sure took a lot of pictures with bad guys while there...oh uh XD.

                                We went back to the Exhibit Hall and when we entered we saw these two Stormtroopers with an Imperial Flag. We stopped and got our picture taken with them :). We went and bought some more Star Wars stuffed toys and got ourselves a special card of a character from The Phantom Menace(this day was Padme). I saw some really cool posters while we were in line for the cards; I saw posters of Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The Chronicles of Narnia, Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel, Once Upon A Time, and Doctor. So cool!!! :D :D

                     A Japanease Star Wars booth. My sister, being a huge Japan fan, really liked the booth.

                           My sister and I sneaking into the Sith Tomb world of Korriban to plant bombs in the Valley of the Dark Lords while the Sith Lords running this place were busy looking at their computers. They were so busy looking they didn't notice two young Padawans sneaking in for their of utmost importance mission. We're very stealthy.

                                  My sister and I on the Coruscant cityscape. Mission complete!

                                   This lady had a really cool Jedi cosplay. The mask was really neat- when she talked its jaws would move and it looked very natural.

                                      The next thing we did was go to a panel about the future of Star Wars 3D where we heard about how films were made, were shown how the 3D effects are utilized, and we also got to see clips of Attack of the Clones in 3D(which they are currently working on). I have to say, it's going to look very awesome!!! :D :D :D My favorites out of the scenes I got to see were when, near the end, the Clone troopers are being deployed and the ships are taking off(sooo cool looking) and the scene where Anakin and Obi-Wan are in the speeder and Anakin leaps out. It was really cool to hear that George Lucas had intentionally filmed his movies in a way that made converting it to 3D much easier. Also, before going to the panel, Lillian Skye interviewed my sister and I about school while we were in line.

                                   The same Padme cosplayer from earlier. Her outfit here was just as good. I loved how she did it, especially the hair(I know I already said that, I just really liked her costumes).

                  Before going into the panel, I had set up a time to meet up with some of my friends before we had to leave(I had said goodbye to Arda earlier at lunch, though we randomly passed her and her brother while walking around). We got to our chosen spot, under the Death Star, and met up with our friend Shaak Ti who was already there.

                                Shaak Ti, myself, and my sister with our new stuffed Star Wars characters!(the Obi-Wan one I got for my brother; for myself, I got an Obi-Wan, an Anakin, and the Commander Fox I am holding).
             While we were taking the above picture, the guy you see sitting behind us asked if we would like to pose for some pictures for him. We of course said yes and he took us over to the windows for a cool shot. We found out he was from a group called "The People of Cosplay" and that our pictures would be posted on the Facebook page. He had several professional cameras and he definitely knew what he was talking about when it came to photography. 



                                  Shaak Ti, my sister, and I. I took these pictures from "The People of Cosplay" Facebook page.




                  

                     
                                        I really like the above and below images :D                                

                  


                         

                             Soon, several of my other friends came over and we stood around talking Star Wars and other things for awhile. It was great and we had a lot of fun and I really wish we could have visited much longer.
                      Sadly, it all came to an end and we had to say goodbye. I definitely plan on Skyping everyone  soon(I need to get that planned out). :( While I was sad I had to say goodbye to my friends, I was glad I got to meet so many awesome people and got to have such an amazing time. I'd never thought I'd have the chance to go a Star Wars convention, much less Celebration VI, before I turned eighteen but I did and I am very happy(thank you to my parents for taking me!!!) :D
           We left and picked up my Mom and brother from Animal Kingdom and we went back to the condo for some rest before the next day where we'd be visiting the Disney park of Epcot.

                       I have to say, after seeing all the amazing costumes at CVI, I have decided that I shall be joining The Rebel Legion, The Jedi Assembly , and The 501st Legion when I am old enough. For The Rebel Legion, I will be cosplaying Obi-Wan Kenobi from The Phantom Menace; I will also do Siri Tachi. For the Jedi Assembly I will use the Jedi costume I have now and be my girl Jedi character. For the 501st Legion, I will be cosplaying Darth Zannah and possibly Darth Revan and a Stormtrooper.

I hoped you enjoyed my second post of Celebration VI. I had such a blast and I am very thankful I was able to go. What were your favorite parts, if you went, and if you didn't, what were your favorite parts in my re-telling of the event?
Now off to Disney World and Universal!!! :D :D
May the Force be with you....Always :)
Jedi Shena Tokala signing out